Feel really tiring this few day. Unstoppable work and training. Expectation and hoping from company. Make me feel like want to escape from this circumstances....
Thursday nite got the chance to chat with one of my buddy. Ask regarding his future. Feel thankful to him as he knew wat he did now. Pray in heart so that he can make his dream becum reality under God planning. Another fren who will go to theology school to study next year also keep encouraging me. By joke, i tell him "who know nexy year i will sit beside u?" Hahaha.... But down from my heart, i feel hard to make it.
I am sure that at the time being to fully served God as a Pastor is not the planning of God for me. If it is so, early during my secondary school, i already went for theological studies. In my own planning, i prefer to serve in a christian ministries which is carried on the game for those teenager and unbeliever. Counselling and encouraging other is the GIFT given by God to me. That why till now lots of fren will share their thing to me.
One of my fren told me that if his planning is not fulfill by God this time. He will start his career life and give himself another 10 year before he step bek to his full time serving life. His decision quite shocked me as in my opinion, i know that god had His own planning on everyone. Instead of we planned for ourselves, why not we just continue our current life and left God to plan for the blur and beautiful future of us. After i really think through it after i work in the jungle laz nite, i think that we need to be aggresive and active instead of passively let other to plan for us. Maybe God already give us the way but we did not notice it due to attracted abd engaged by this world vision.
Everything seems fine for me now as i just confirmed by company this month. Will have a new task and expectation from the company. My planning toward my future home is still in progress. My current family, financially, harmonily is running well. It is like a heaven picture for my life now. Working for the weekday, when come bek from work during weekend, gt the geng of fren who will limteh and sing k wif me. Great....
But i know that we have our own mission in this world. Those thing that seems to be gud but after u experience through it is harm to our serving to God. At the stage now, i cnt do any changing for my life becoz i dun have any foundation to do that and i also gt a lot of thing to care. But after 8 year, maybe i will take a step forward with the blessing from God. This 8 year from now, i will expose myself to this society. Breakthrough the life of people whether in work, church or family, i think this will provide me with lots of lifetime experience when i serve God one day. Learn as much thing as i can although i already jump into this society for one year. But i just feel like innocent and naive toward those so-call experienced people.
God, protect my heart and continue burning my glow to u. Hope wat i do can really glorify ur name in this world... Looking forward for this weekend. Expected a meaningful and warm weekened as will meet some fren from other place. Another sharing moment among my buddy. I like this type of feeling and i really treasure it as who know this will change after all of them start their career soon....
2011年10月15日星期六
2011年9月28日星期三
四季
从小就有小小的梦想，总有一天要踏足于四季之乡。享受那不属于热带国家的熏陶... 坐在摇晃不停的快艇，我的思绪又编织了无数个幻想的空间...
春天
立足于西藏高原的大草原...
绿猷青葱的草地，高耸入云的雪山...
传说对西藏原住民来说，雪山乃是先人过失后灵魂的安息地...
躺卧于草地，眺望一啷无际的蓝天，不时远处传来牛羊的低鸣声...
暂时使人抛下尘世间所有的重担，压力...
享受着被大自然所洗涤的灵魂的舒醒...
白花齐放，鸟语花香...
小小的梦想，于爱侣男耕女织...
小孩追着梅花鹿...
一家人 追求属于我们的天堂...
夏天
牵着骆驼，漫步于黄昏的大沙漠...
尘土纷飞，无数滚滚的黄沙...
仿佛向人类宣告属于他们的主权...
是的...望着无尽头的沙漠...
感觉到人类的微笑...
曾几何时，那无数的黄沙低下...
埋着古人类的文明，无数的战争...
试问千禧世纪的文明，哪一个不是从先人流血舍身而研发出来的呢...
踏足于黄沙上，心灵间仿佛聆听着先人们的呼声...
是的，现金的人类被太多属世的喧哗遮掩了双耳...
听不到世上那呼求者的呼声...
我聆听，在这无人的沙漠...
那造物主对我的声音...
秋天
秋天的童话...属于那樱花之都...
曾经迷茫于墨尔本的秋天，秋黄的树叶，微带凉意的秋风...
小时的梦想，一定要置身于樱花之国...
观赏樱花散落，尤其在缤纷细雨中...
沁入心脾...
鸟瞰远处，不时看见不同国度的人，在这唯美的时刻，留下人生的回忆...
迎着秋天微凉的溪风，闭上双眊，用身心去感受这不属尘土的洗涤...
呼... 呼出一口气，在无数的花瓣伴舞中，
留下安静的足迹....
冬天
漫步于浪漫之都-巴黎...
特别喜欢冬天，因这时人都特别安静...
眺望无数的情侣在这冬季中为对方许下终生的承诺...
未有家室的我，心中默默为他们送上祝福...
盼望真有那么一天，我和她能相约在这冬季的巴黎...
在上帝及铁塔的见证下，我对她许下属于我和她的承诺...
冬季...是个祝福人的季节...
或许有一天我将会一个人，慢慢的走在这香波街上...
但，属于一个人的冬天，心里却是温暖的...
雪花飘飘，月光萧瑟...
不知冬天的夜空，我会不会听到...
那祝福的旋律...
如果有，我愿安寝于这交响曲中...
今晚的夜空，宁静萧瑟...
梦醒时分，发觉这是南柯一梦....
但属于我的天空，时间依然不等待...
置身于这尘世，我还是要...
追求那有永恒价值的盼望...
春天
立足于西藏高原的大草原...
绿猷青葱的草地，高耸入云的雪山...
传说对西藏原住民来说，雪山乃是先人过失后灵魂的安息地...
躺卧于草地，眺望一啷无际的蓝天，不时远处传来牛羊的低鸣声...
暂时使人抛下尘世间所有的重担，压力...
享受着被大自然所洗涤的灵魂的舒醒...
白花齐放，鸟语花香...
小小的梦想，于爱侣男耕女织...
小孩追着梅花鹿...
一家人 追求属于我们的天堂...
夏天
牵着骆驼，漫步于黄昏的大沙漠...
尘土纷飞，无数滚滚的黄沙...
仿佛向人类宣告属于他们的主权...
是的...望着无尽头的沙漠...
感觉到人类的微笑...
曾几何时，那无数的黄沙低下...
埋着古人类的文明，无数的战争...
试问千禧世纪的文明，哪一个不是从先人流血舍身而研发出来的呢...
踏足于黄沙上，心灵间仿佛聆听着先人们的呼声...
是的，现金的人类被太多属世的喧哗遮掩了双耳...
听不到世上那呼求者的呼声...
我聆听，在这无人的沙漠...
那造物主对我的声音...
秋天
秋天的童话...属于那樱花之都...
曾经迷茫于墨尔本的秋天，秋黄的树叶，微带凉意的秋风...
小时的梦想，一定要置身于樱花之国...
观赏樱花散落，尤其在缤纷细雨中...
沁入心脾...
鸟瞰远处，不时看见不同国度的人，在这唯美的时刻，留下人生的回忆...
迎着秋天微凉的溪风，闭上双眊，用身心去感受这不属尘土的洗涤...
呼... 呼出一口气，在无数的花瓣伴舞中，
留下安静的足迹....
冬天
漫步于浪漫之都-巴黎...
特别喜欢冬天，因这时人都特别安静...
眺望无数的情侣在这冬季中为对方许下终生的承诺...
未有家室的我，心中默默为他们送上祝福...
盼望真有那么一天，我和她能相约在这冬季的巴黎...
在上帝及铁塔的见证下，我对她许下属于我和她的承诺...
冬季...是个祝福人的季节...
或许有一天我将会一个人，慢慢的走在这香波街上...
但，属于一个人的冬天，心里却是温暖的...
雪花飘飘，月光萧瑟...
不知冬天的夜空，我会不会听到...
那祝福的旋律...
如果有，我愿安寝于这交响曲中...
今晚的夜空，宁静萧瑟...
梦醒时分，发觉这是南柯一梦....
但属于我的天空，时间依然不等待...
置身于这尘世，我还是要...
追求那有永恒价值的盼望...
2011年9月17日星期六
Pontianak Lifecamp
Get the chance to serve in Pontianak Lifecamp during the Raya vacation. Second "overcoutry" serving after the Melbourne lifecamp. Taking express bus going through half of Sarawak, from Sibu to Kuching and then imigration at a place that i forget. Step pass the country by-line. Yeah.... Among 8 of us we shout together coz we oledi in foreign country, Indonesia also it is not " over the Sea". Hahaha....
Arrive Pontianak quite late evening, just step down from the bus, oledi feel the warm and dry wind blowed to our face. Wow!!!! Totally different experience wif winter Melbourne. Here is really hot like sauna and spa. We as if walk in the bbq dinner party as the air here is contaminated by released smoke during to open air burning and the suffering is this been done during the dry season.. Oh man!!!!!
First time i serve those indonesian teenager and feel really different. Firstly, languages barrier. Actually i am so confident with my language mastering but my Bahasa Melayu Sarawak is totally cant be used here. Wat i tell them, they dun understand and wat they tell me, i barely understand little bit. Oh.... really hard and gt a little bit discourage. Mainly this is the chance for me to talk more to them, know their lifestyle, understand their current position and try to encourage them. But here for me is facing a really tough challenge. So, i am proud of those Belle and Sharon who will to go for mission here. i think they must be facing the same problem during their early time here.
Second, culture shock!!!! For the first time in my life, i have rice and salted fish for my breakfast. OH MAN!!!!! 不能接受!!!! Here no kampua or kolo mee de?? After asking from those who had been here for sometime, i know that most of the indonesian need to do tough and hard work who need more energy. So for them, they need to have rice for their meal so that they can substain to work for a long time. Never mind, it' s a good experience of me. Down in my heart, i feel that all the indonesian people must be feel great if they have sumthing to eat assum of them come from poor and underpaying family. Thanks God for providing them wat they need.
This camp give me a different experience. As all the volunteers will wake up in the morning to sing and sharing the bible knowledge, the indonesian teenager wake up even early compare to us. i feel proud and encourage by their spirit. 5 o'clock in the morning!!!! this is the time i sleep the warmest and sweetness!! But they already "make a call" to God at this time. this really remind me of our behaviour to God. We live in such a glorious and peaceful country. Religion is free and not restricted and most of us need not to help our parent in their farming or other work. Actually we have more time to get closed with God, but are we treasure our time??
From Belle and Sharon, i have been encourage by their spirit. At the time most of the teenager thinking of which university i should go? which smart phone i should have? which girl or boy should i chase? which country should i go during my vacation? they already decide to serve God full time. Remind me of my promise to God. There is one day God will asking back from me.
Still waiting for the call of God, when the time and chance is there, i sure will put down everything and walk for God. I know that God have His own planning wat i need to do is wait and them humble to obey. it is not a hard task for me as wat i have now is all from God. Without Him, i am nothing in this world, just a normal guy borned by my parent.
Crucified.. Lay behind a stone...
You lived to die... Rejected and alone....
Like a rose... Trampled on the ground...
You took the fall.... And thought of me...
Above all...
Tears falling everytime i listen this song. I think there is no one in this world except Jesus Christ is borned to live to die. I wish to give the most valuable thing of me to God. MY LIFE... Fully been His servant in lifeimpact ministries. Waiting from His call and now i just need to equip myself so that i can serve Him well when the opportunity is coming...
Arrive Pontianak quite late evening, just step down from the bus, oledi feel the warm and dry wind blowed to our face. Wow!!!! Totally different experience wif winter Melbourne. Here is really hot like sauna and spa. We as if walk in the bbq dinner party as the air here is contaminated by released smoke during to open air burning and the suffering is this been done during the dry season.. Oh man!!!!!
First time i serve those indonesian teenager and feel really different. Firstly, languages barrier. Actually i am so confident with my language mastering but my Bahasa Melayu Sarawak is totally cant be used here. Wat i tell them, they dun understand and wat they tell me, i barely understand little bit. Oh.... really hard and gt a little bit discourage. Mainly this is the chance for me to talk more to them, know their lifestyle, understand their current position and try to encourage them. But here for me is facing a really tough challenge. So, i am proud of those Belle and Sharon who will to go for mission here. i think they must be facing the same problem during their early time here.
Second, culture shock!!!! For the first time in my life, i have rice and salted fish for my breakfast. OH MAN!!!!! 不能接受!!!! Here no kampua or kolo mee de?? After asking from those who had been here for sometime, i know that most of the indonesian need to do tough and hard work who need more energy. So for them, they need to have rice for their meal so that they can substain to work for a long time. Never mind, it' s a good experience of me. Down in my heart, i feel that all the indonesian people must be feel great if they have sumthing to eat assum of them come from poor and underpaying family. Thanks God for providing them wat they need.
This camp give me a different experience. As all the volunteers will wake up in the morning to sing and sharing the bible knowledge, the indonesian teenager wake up even early compare to us. i feel proud and encourage by their spirit. 5 o'clock in the morning!!!! this is the time i sleep the warmest and sweetness!! But they already "make a call" to God at this time. this really remind me of our behaviour to God. We live in such a glorious and peaceful country. Religion is free and not restricted and most of us need not to help our parent in their farming or other work. Actually we have more time to get closed with God, but are we treasure our time??
From Belle and Sharon, i have been encourage by their spirit. At the time most of the teenager thinking of which university i should go? which smart phone i should have? which girl or boy should i chase? which country should i go during my vacation? they already decide to serve God full time. Remind me of my promise to God. There is one day God will asking back from me.
Still waiting for the call of God, when the time and chance is there, i sure will put down everything and walk for God. I know that God have His own planning wat i need to do is wait and them humble to obey. it is not a hard task for me as wat i have now is all from God. Without Him, i am nothing in this world, just a normal guy borned by my parent.
Crucified.. Lay behind a stone...
You lived to die... Rejected and alone....
Like a rose... Trampled on the ground...
You took the fall.... And thought of me...
Above all...
Tears falling everytime i listen this song. I think there is no one in this world except Jesus Christ is borned to live to die. I wish to give the most valuable thing of me to God. MY LIFE... Fully been His servant in lifeimpact ministries. Waiting from His call and now i just need to equip myself so that i can serve Him well when the opportunity is coming...
2011年7月17日星期日
~~~Waiting~~~
Already joined my new company for more than 4 months, feel like everything go smooth like those i plan before. Feeling great for wat i have now and continue to striking for my goal.
On 3/7-10/7, i am pleased for giving the opportunity to serve in Lifegame Camp in Melbourne, Australia. It' s a amazing experience and once again my spiritual life is being regened after the camp. Walking down the Melbourne city street, experienced the winter cool weather there and down in my heart, i thank God for His wonderful creation. I am really being adored by the scenery of this city and also the culture of Australian. From one of the sister there, the culture there is "polite" culture and that why when the pedestrian want to cross the busy street, we can see that the vehicles there will automatically stopped to allow the pedestrain to cross it first. Wau!!! i hardly can believe it as feel shame to say that this culture is impossible to implement in my own country. Malaysia, we are much too far left behind by those wstern company. Just one word can describe, Uncivilization!!!!
Serving in the camp provide me with the refresh of my previous serving to God. I feel great and warm even though i still cant get use to the cool weather there until most of my lips is bleeding coz of drying. Actually long time ago, i have a mission in my mind, to fully serve in the Lifeimpact Ministries. I still remember that this is my promise to God when i joined the camp, i hope to be the nucleus partner for this ministries. From the Melbourne camp, i know that the church community there have the idea to set up Australia Lifeteam there. Purposely to help the Australia Church in developing their teenager and enable them to find their purpose of life. I felt like God is calling to me. But i not sure whether this is the calling from God is merely my own dream.....
To serve there, i need to get a permanent resident status there and for the foreigner like me, the easiest way is to find a job there. The company that i worked now had a team at Australia, i felt like really wan to transfer from Sarawak to Australia. From the night sharing with Pastor Kwan, he do encouraged me to take this step seriously and bravely. He mentioned the limited of those servant at Australia and if they really wan to set up this Australia team, they need more people to join them especially those who are more experience. I dare to take this challenge but are this really a good choice for me?? i dunno...
Honestly, i felt hard to put down all my thing in Malaysia and just fly over to serve there. My family, my career, my fren, my gf and many others.... Everything is just fine and good for me now if i stay in Sarawak, but i dunno why i still of thinking of this matter currently. i know the gospel factory in Australia is big. I really wan to help them but how?? Just feel like God is calling me. But i need more prayer to justify it. Coz my decision will affect most of the things now....
Now staying in KL, waiting for my training on Monday. On 29/8-31/8, i will serve in Lifegame Camp at Pontianak, Indonesia. Pray for me and hope God will speak to me that time. God, please lead my way, listen Your will but not my hope. Prepare everything for me and provide me with wisdom to make this decision. When the time come, i will follow your plan coz You noe me better than others in this world. Hope my serving will glorify Your name in this world.
On 3/7-10/7, i am pleased for giving the opportunity to serve in Lifegame Camp in Melbourne, Australia. It' s a amazing experience and once again my spiritual life is being regened after the camp. Walking down the Melbourne city street, experienced the winter cool weather there and down in my heart, i thank God for His wonderful creation. I am really being adored by the scenery of this city and also the culture of Australian. From one of the sister there, the culture there is "polite" culture and that why when the pedestrian want to cross the busy street, we can see that the vehicles there will automatically stopped to allow the pedestrain to cross it first. Wau!!! i hardly can believe it as feel shame to say that this culture is impossible to implement in my own country. Malaysia, we are much too far left behind by those wstern company. Just one word can describe, Uncivilization!!!!
Serving in the camp provide me with the refresh of my previous serving to God. I feel great and warm even though i still cant get use to the cool weather there until most of my lips is bleeding coz of drying. Actually long time ago, i have a mission in my mind, to fully serve in the Lifeimpact Ministries. I still remember that this is my promise to God when i joined the camp, i hope to be the nucleus partner for this ministries. From the Melbourne camp, i know that the church community there have the idea to set up Australia Lifeteam there. Purposely to help the Australia Church in developing their teenager and enable them to find their purpose of life. I felt like God is calling to me. But i not sure whether this is the calling from God is merely my own dream.....
To serve there, i need to get a permanent resident status there and for the foreigner like me, the easiest way is to find a job there. The company that i worked now had a team at Australia, i felt like really wan to transfer from Sarawak to Australia. From the night sharing with Pastor Kwan, he do encouraged me to take this step seriously and bravely. He mentioned the limited of those servant at Australia and if they really wan to set up this Australia team, they need more people to join them especially those who are more experience. I dare to take this challenge but are this really a good choice for me?? i dunno...
Honestly, i felt hard to put down all my thing in Malaysia and just fly over to serve there. My family, my career, my fren, my gf and many others.... Everything is just fine and good for me now if i stay in Sarawak, but i dunno why i still of thinking of this matter currently. i know the gospel factory in Australia is big. I really wan to help them but how?? Just feel like God is calling me. But i need more prayer to justify it. Coz my decision will affect most of the things now....
Now staying in KL, waiting for my training on Monday. On 29/8-31/8, i will serve in Lifegame Camp at Pontianak, Indonesia. Pray for me and hope God will speak to me that time. God, please lead my way, listen Your will but not my hope. Prepare everything for me and provide me with wisdom to make this decision. When the time come, i will follow your plan coz You noe me better than others in this world. Hope my serving will glorify Your name in this world.
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