Feel really tiring this few day. Unstoppable work and training. Expectation and hoping from company. Make me feel like want to escape from this circumstances....
Thursday nite got the chance to chat with one of my buddy. Ask regarding his future. Feel thankful to him as he knew wat he did now. Pray in heart so that he can make his dream becum reality under God planning. Another fren who will go to theology school to study next year also keep encouraging me. By joke, i tell him "who know nexy year i will sit beside u?" Hahaha.... But down from my heart, i feel hard to make it.
I am sure that at the time being to fully served God as a Pastor is not the planning of God for me. If it is so, early during my secondary school, i already went for theological studies. In my own planning, i prefer to serve in a christian ministries which is carried on the game for those teenager and unbeliever. Counselling and encouraging other is the GIFT given by God to me. That why till now lots of fren will share their thing to me.
One of my fren told me that if his planning is not fulfill by God this time. He will start his career life and give himself another 10 year before he step bek to his full time serving life. His decision quite shocked me as in my opinion, i know that god had His own planning on everyone. Instead of we planned for ourselves, why not we just continue our current life and left God to plan for the blur and beautiful future of us. After i really think through it after i work in the jungle laz nite, i think that we need to be aggresive and active instead of passively let other to plan for us. Maybe God already give us the way but we did not notice it due to attracted abd engaged by this world vision.
Everything seems fine for me now as i just confirmed by company this month. Will have a new task and expectation from the company. My planning toward my future home is still in progress. My current family, financially, harmonily is running well. It is like a heaven picture for my life now. Working for the weekday, when come bek from work during weekend, gt the geng of fren who will limteh and sing k wif me. Great....
But i know that we have our own mission in this world. Those thing that seems to be gud but after u experience through it is harm to our serving to God. At the stage now, i cnt do any changing for my life becoz i dun have any foundation to do that and i also gt a lot of thing to care. But after 8 year, maybe i will take a step forward with the blessing from God. This 8 year from now, i will expose myself to this society. Breakthrough the life of people whether in work, church or family, i think this will provide me with lots of lifetime experience when i serve God one day. Learn as much thing as i can although i already jump into this society for one year. But i just feel like innocent and naive toward those so-call experienced people.
God, protect my heart and continue burning my glow to u. Hope wat i do can really glorify ur name in this world... Looking forward for this weekend. Expected a meaningful and warm weekened as will meet some fren from other place. Another sharing moment among my buddy. I like this type of feeling and i really treasure it as who know this will change after all of them start their career soon....
